Running towards the playoffs again

I sure needed a big win on Sunday and we sure got one, folks. Yours truly came down with a bug on Saturday that may or may not have been caused by an excessive round of Crazy Eights with some of my buddies at the Pypsawa II Camp. Or maybe it was caused by the sub-zero conditions on the deep-frozen lake out front. Or maybe, just maybe, these thorax gut-woozies were brought on by one too many ‘Guams’ – a delicious and tropical-themed libation dreamt up by my good pal Slowhand Lucious. At any rate, I was running on empty as we motor-trucked home passed the Blue Hills and miles upon miles of lone-some Northern Packer Country.
Not ones to mope about or secede to internal ills, The Warden and I paid a visit to the local grocer and picked up several thirst-quenching tonics before departing the Washburn County Jack-Pine Forests. With our hydration meters climbing and our brains whirring once again, we tuned into whatever frequency modulation station carried the strongest wave signal and enjoyed the ride. Although we were both running on empty tanks, General Grant and the Offensive Line carried the day, bringing balance to the attack while securing our 18th Division Title – the first under Coach McCarthy. Although the running game has been on the up-swing in recent weeks, Sunday’s game against Oakland marked the finest effort of the season, albeit against a ground-rush defense that was as toothless as a Red-Horse Sucker. Don’t be fooled, dear readers: This zone blocking scheming is finally paying healthy dividends.
While General Grant galloped wild as a steel stallion on the thinly frozen tundra, Brett Favre once again proved his dura-bility with yet another record-setting start. While we were enthused by the radio booth call, the game was doubly impressive when reviewed on VHS Recording Tape later that evening. Once again, Brett proved that nippy weather serves as only a fools-gold deterrent in the passing game. Jeepers creepers, folks. Ol’ Number Four must have mitts bigger than Sasquatchewan’s Most Behemoth Windigo, what with the way he decisively launches the pig-skin through the brisk arctic air.
The special teams also deserve a ‘Union Nod’ as they earned their name once again this season with the speedy Will Blackmon busting all loose for two scores. I hope to see more of this in the future.
So now that we’re locked into the playoffs the real challenge is finishing strongly. The Cow-Bells remain (effectively) two games up for the top seed after the Tabby-Cats fizzled under the pressure in Fort Detroit. A first round bye should be the main focus of our campaign and that should be secured in the coming weeks. Seattle is putting together another fine season out there in Louisiana Territory under Papa Holmgren’s watchful eye, but I don’t think they’re a real threat. We control the future for now and the next trial appears down-river near the confluence of the Missouri and Mississippi. Many folks had the Ram-Horned-Sheep pegged as a play-off challenger this season but things have gone sour in the Show-Me-State. Injuries have decimated their roster, but any team can be dangerous at home. McCarthy has proved tenacious on the road with excellent preparations, however, so I’m calling for victory number twelve: Green Bay, 26 – Saint Louis, 17. Huz-zah!
Until next week, then.