Messin’ up a fine batch of chili

Sunday afternoon I was in high spirits, cruising in my motor-buggy to visit my friendly neighborhood grocer. Grade A Beef, Pork Sausage, fresh tomatoes and eggs for frying. Check. Cheese curds, shredded cheese, Parmesan. Check. Three kinds of hot sauce, including Tiger Sauce, a big bag of Fritos and some Coos Coos. Check. Hold the noodles and hold the beans, friendly grocer. I’m making Union Chili – The chili that warms the bones and delights the tasting-buds with plenty of goodies and a zero-tolerance policy towards filler. Yes yes, I thought, as I trucked my ingredients back to Headquarters, today is going to be a fine day! First the Cubs got swept and now we’re going to put the Bears into the cellar for good, right next to the canned pears and the old broom and the potato bin.
Oh yes, the day was setting up nicely; but dear readers, even Chili Day can turn sour, and this one certainly did.
Let’s not over-think this fiasco, though. We started out the night hotter than that Tiger Sauce in my belly but the momentum quickly reversed itself once ol’ Admiral Slop-Mess reared his ugly head. You know the rest: Turnovers and penalties and more turnovers. I’m obviously a big fan of James Jones, but that kid let us down Sunday. At least Coach McCarthy was a good enough man to give him an ear-ful.
But the Bears were who we thought they were, as another coach has famously said. They were depleted by injuries, washed up, inept offensively and simply not in our class. And we let them off the hook. We beat ourselves. The blame goes all around the club-house. Coach McCarthy said on Monday that “We didn’t take care of business,” and he’s right, but on the brighter side, we have a decent lead and a better team, and we’re still in control of the NFC North.
I just wish they hadn’t ruined Chili Day like that. A loss like that pains me every time I go in for left-overs, and I’ve still got five gallons of chili left in the ice-box.
But we must move on. I’ve got a few other items to address.
First off, John Madden should just hang up the microphone already. “The Old Romo?” You just called Brett Favre, the greatest quarterback to ever play the game, “The Old (Tony) Romo?” Repeatedly? I might be old but at least I’m not senile. I can certainly appreciate the comparison, but have some respect you rambling maniac. Goodness grief!
On a more positive note, our resident speed rusher extraordinaire KGB quietly claimed the Packers all-time sack record last week. He may not be playing full time anymore, but that monster will surely help us down the home stretch with his mind-crushing quick-ness. Even if you are reading this, Jason Campbell, you will not be able to avoid him!
This leads me to Campbell’s team – The Redskins. Hard to believe we still have a team called that in this day and age, isn’t it? Anyways, they beat up on the Lions pretty well last week, but I think we’ll be OK. The Packers coaching staff will have the fellows ready to go, and hopefully playing cleaner ball by Sunday. I think this will be a good game to get the team back on track and keep us perfect against the NFC East. Look for even more improvement in the running game, especially from the Visored Vernand Morency who looked sleek and speedy and mysterious in his first action of the year. Mark it: Packers – 33, Redskins – 13.
Until next week, then.