I watched the game at Cousin Walter’s house like I do for all the cable television broad-casts, and he was puppy-sitting for a baby Husky that was simply adorable. We had some hot wings on the heater and some cold beers ready and everything was set for the Packers to build on their greatest win of the season and keep pace in the lousy NFC North. The Husky’s name was Tomato and he was having a good time chewin’ on my arm and knocking over our beers. He had ears as big as a white-tail, monster paws and a long tail, and when he galloped around the room he looked really goofy.
Well, dear readers, our defense looked even more out-of-whack on Monday. They were an embarrassment on National Television. Our friend, Ralph the Rascal asked out loud how they could play so well one week and just lay a turd in the bathing-tub the next, and nobody could give him an answer. Ralph the Rascal and me and Walter just sat there the whole fourth quarter watching the game with blank stupid looks on our faces. We wondered if Defensive Coordinator Bob Sanders was watching the game, too. We wondered how the team could play worse after half-time. What in the heck? Pass me another Pabst Blue Ribbon, Ralph. Oh, what in the heeeck?
Well I guess after sleeping on it for a while we need to go ahead and give Mr. Drew Brees a big helping of credit. I think some-times you just run into a buzz saw and there is nothing you can do. The perfect storm, as they say. He was really some-thing, that guy.
Ronnie Rodgers, on the other hand, looked about as frazzled as I’ve ever seen. He looked like a first-year starter. I’ve got to give him credit for the lick he put on that defensive back following the first interception, but overall, he was lousy. At least he admitted it. “We just let this one get away from us. Every game from here on out is a must-win,” said Rodgers.
And he certainly is right about them all being must-wins. The NFC North may be weaker than a baby husky’s self-restraint when looking at a plate of human-food, but some-one is going to win 9 games here. What’s the point, though. None of these teams have proven they can play consistently. Whoever wins the North will probably lose in the first round anyways.
Hard to stay positive after seeing some-thing like that, dear readers.
I don’t care who the quarterback is or any of that, because when you give up 50 points you don’t have a shot in this league. Atari Bigby has not been the same animal this season. He needs to shape up. The whole defense looked like a parade of zombies out there. Instead of brains they were looking for embarrassment. Ahhh, Embarrass Us Please! Breeeeees! Ahhhh!
And it is about damned time they can Frosty the Punter! Jeepers Creepers already!
I don’t wanna be that guy who just complains without offering a solution, so here’s one: Hold an open tryout this week in Green Bay and hire the strongest-legged amateur punter you can find amidst the weary Wisconsin citizenry. This would most certainly produce a better punter than Frosty, and it would provide us with a feel-good story should the Packers prove un-fit for playoff football this season. Just imagine. The new punter could be your butcher or barber. I’d take just about anyone. Maybe just hire a really chubby fellow. Even if he couldn’t punt very far at least it would provide a chuckle when he shanked one. Good-ness.
Well we’ve got one more weekend of hunting and of course I am still looking for that big buck. Hope you all have a happy Thanksgiving and hope that you, too, can eat a pile of turkey and fall asleep in a rocking chair like a hibernating critter. When you wake up, maybe the Packers will have a decent punter and a better game-plan. Until then.